jokes | funny jokes | dad jokes | 15
There are 3 forms of a girl:
No. 1: The one who loves you with eyes closed – known as Girlfriend
No. 2: The one who loves you til her eyes closed – known as Mother
No. 3: The one who loves you with her big eyes staring at you – know as Wife.:))
Husband buys a mouth fresher for wife.
Wife: Why you don’t buy for you.
Husband: I remain silent anyways.
teacher: Name two animals that live in a cold region?
student: A polar bear and his wife
Wife is like a god’s prasad (fruit), you have to eat it without making any complaint.
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Wife: I heard that men get angels in heave and what women get?
Man: God only listens to those who are needy!
Lady: People say that in heaven Man and woman can not live together!
Male: Yes, that is why it is known as heave!
why does traffic stop when old people smile,
because their teeth are so yellow.
For voting you age should be 18 but for marriage you must be 21, why?
Wise man replies: Because government knows that taking care of the wife is bigger task than taking care of nation.
Boy sends message: I Love You
Got an alert: Not delivered
Me sitting with him suggested: Oh my friend, this is God giving you a chance. Save yourself…LOL
A best friend status: Waiting for perfect man.
Me replied: Nobody is perfect.. Lets make each other perfect.
Wife: “How would you describe me?”
Husband: “ABCDEFGHIJK.”
Wife: “What does that mean?”
Husband: “Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot.”
Wife: “Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?”
Husband: “I’m just kidding!”
Her: Do you know it takes you more than a hour to get ready.
Him: But you aren’t as cute as you think you are.
It is true that women live longer than men. But the real reason behind this… is that they don`t have to live with women.
They say that technology will replace paper. Do they ever tried to wipe that with an iPad.
Boy: What you like most?
Girl: Hmm..
Boy: Water?
Girl: Yes..
Boy: Thanks for liking 70% of me!
What did the bartender say to a Sandwich.
Sorry we don’t serve food in here!
The woman who invented the line, “All men are the same.” was a chinese woman who lost her husband in a crowd in China.
Once a sweet little girl became restless as the preacher’s sermon dragged on and on. Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered, “Mommy, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?”
Leena comes to professor’s office after school hours. She glances down the hall, closes his door, kneels pleadingly & says “I would do anything to pass this exam.”
She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, gazes meaningfully into his eyes.
“I mean…” she whispers, “…I would do…anything!”
He returns her gaze. “Anything?”
“Yes, anything!”
His voice turns to a whisper. “Go and…study!.”
A Female walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch. “I couldn’t help noticing how happy you look,” she said. “What’s your secret for a long happy life?”
“Well, honey, I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day,” he said. “I also drink a case of whisky a week, eat fatty foods and never exercise.”
“That’s amazing, “the woman said. “How old are you?”
“Twenty-Two”
A tall well built woman with good
reputation who can cook frogs
legs, who appreciates a good fuc-
schia garden, classical misic and tal-
king without getting too serious.